These are small somewhat trivial moments that often show up in day to day life. However, if we do not go in and remedy it experience upon experience can lead to Johnny to start to feel not seen or heard or valued for his innate interests or desires.

Drop the rules, drop the judgment, drop the ideas, drop all the history that we have with these emotions and just play. The hope is that we have a safe container for the child to practice and embody these emotions so it doesn’t feel like such a big deal in the moment.

Think about the “rules” that we have created for the way things “should be” - then question all of them. Question the expectations that we have for them and for ourselves; are they driven by what matters to us or ways we've been programmed by family, culture, society?

At times there are vulnerabilities or differences that come into play in terms of eating "cleanly" or in a "socially appropriate way.

We want to allow moments for them to get in their flow state, which is when they're totally invested in their learning or the activities and whatever they're doing and give them space to be on their own and explore. In those moments we're admiring what they're actually doing no matter what it is even if it seems really simple.

It is the way we are taking in the cues or signals from the environment, processing, filtering, adapting and executing an output to whatever we are experiencing on the inside as a result of the world and relationships around us.

IMAGINE: you as a child, crying uncontrollably about something that seemed really important at the time.

Then, think: how did your parents react? 

It's hard to talk about tantrums and meltdowns without talking internalizing and externalizing behaviors. Externalizers are the  kids that tend to have big reactions, that are expressing their emotions, and are letting their emotions be known. Internalizers are the more "easygoing" and have fly under the radar type of behaviors.

In a world of facade and these small snapshots highlighting all of the goodness life has to offer, it’s easy to get caught up in playing the “more” game instead of focusing on simplicity, connection.